Mina Button's blog

kink and feminism and stuff…formerly known as Absinthe Cocktail.

Bits and Bobs

Break up notes: Oh my god, everything is so hard and awful right this minute.  As long as I stay busy, I feel okay–Garnet and my job are pretty much saving my life right now.  Today is actually, seriously, the first day since it happened that I have been in the apartment by myself, and while I’ve been looking forward to this and saying how badly I need a day off, now I actually wish I had more to keep busy with.  I should get out of bed and do the dishes.

Brief thoughts on street harassment: Street harassment used to make me scared.  Like, really scared.  Partly this is because the street harassment I deal with is far less intense since I moved to the City.  But also, I feel like I have regained some of my ability to be angry.  So when some random dude, as happened the other day, gives me an appraising look while I’m out running errands and says “Mmmhmm, gorgeous.  That’s very nice.”  I don’t get scared anymore, I get pissed.  I want to yell “This isn’t for you, asshole!”  Because I really, really resent the implication that my attempts to look semi-presentable while doing laundry is treated like I’m a glossy goddamn picture in a magazine, presented for someone else’s enjoyment.  I am a person, not a fucking decoration.

It makes me extra pissed when Garnet and I walk down the street literally holding hands and some dude acts like he’s stumbled onto a Girls Gone Wild taping.  No.  Fuck you.  This has nothing to do with you.

I think I’m getting closer to being the person I’ve always wanted to be.

Remote control vibrators: Remote toys have kind of been an obsession of mine for a while, and I’m really excited to say that I’ve finally found a few that don’t suck.  For a long, long time, I feel like remote toys, while delightful in concept, were severely lacking execution.  Now, with the advent of rechargeable vibes, they’re finally making remote toys that are small enough and quiet enough and holy fuck strong enough to actually work the way I’ve always wanted them to.

Now someone just needs to make one I can put in my butt.

On openness and honesty: After all the confusion and weirdness (and sometimes fuckery) that happened over the course of Roderick’s and my awkward stumblings in the direction of an open relationship, it has seriously amazed me how easy it can be to negotiate things like this.  Seriously, talking about shit in a blunt, honest way and letting your partner know what’s going on is fucking awesome.  Do I still get jealous sometimes?  Yes.  I am kind of a jealous harpy sometimes, largely due to my terrible self-esteem.  But I am starting to feel safe in my relationship, instead of the panicked-death-grip that I have almost physically felt every time I was jealous in any other relationship I’ve been in.

13 Responses to “Bits and Bobs”

  1.   Garnet Says:

    Yay, I'm doing things right! Also, you should let your readers know that you will be expanding upon remote control vibes in a later post this week :3 Because damnit, that counted as play!!P.s. I love you

  2.   fyrespritetryst Says:

    liek dis? http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=22746

  3.   ward.hegedus Says:

    "Now someone just needs to make one I can out up my butt." might be the greatest sentence I've ever read. I am loving the honesty in this post. You're fantastic.

  4.   Artemisia Absinthium Says:

    @fyrespritetryst – Much like that! Though I hate watch batteries…I'm really spoiled and want all my vibrating toys to be rechargeable. But still, that might be a good jumping off point. Thank you!

  5.   Lolita Says:

    You can put a remote control bullet up your butt by using a female condom. Take the inside ring out. Have fun!

  6.   Artemisia Absinthium Says:

    @Lolita – Ohmygoodness, that is fucking brilliant! Thank you! I can't wait to try it.

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